Following the trial of the Hatton Garden Pensioners, newspaper headlines have been keen to find the one that got away. ‘Police Looking for Pensioner with £10m of Jewels.’
Well, aren’t we all, love? They can get in the queue! What a catch this man, known as Basil, is, isn’t he? Yet he’s in a very strange position – he can’t advertise his wealth for fear of the police finding him, so he probably won’t be surrounded by (usually) younger women who suddenly find him attractive.
Yep!
Still hard to feel sorry for Basil, though.
The papers, TV and social media have also been awash with comments on the recent engagement of Jerry Hall and Rupert Murdoch. Lots has been said about companionship between older people, and how loneliness has probably played a big part in them getting together. LONELINESS? COMPANIONSHIP? Hello!!!
‘What first attracted you to the 84-year-old billionaire, Jerry?’
Yes, he looks like a geriatric gecko – a double-bag job as the Sister would say, meaning you wear a bag over your head in case the one over his breaks, – and he has proved to be a pretty vile person over the years, but I fully understand what Jerry’s doing. And to be honest, much as I love the Stones’ music, Mick Jagger has always repulsed me, so she already has form with rich, ugly men. But, she’s doing what Jackie Kennedy did before her when she married Aristotle Onassis i.e. living in a world where super-luxury is the norm; where they will be totally protected from the outside world by the POWER that money brings.
We all know that power is an aphrodisiac, don’t we? How else could women having affairs with the likes of John Prescott, John Major or Prince Charles be explained? And Murdoch is way, way, way wealthier and more powerful than those three. He’s a media baron – he controls the world! I fully understand Jerry’s actions. Of course, they may even be in love. Who knows? Although I will need a bit more convincing to believe that point of view, I have to say.
Meanwhile, I’d just like to put it out there that I’m ready to be a gangster’s moll; I’m ready for an adventure. I will offer a safe haven for the chance to play Bonnie to the missing Basil’s Clyde. And should he finally be caught, I can write a book – Bonnie and Basil – and sell the film rights and live happily ever after. Although I do believe that Pinewood has already cast the film.
Oh well, back to the keyboard!
